Just One More...

 

I’ve never been one of those people who cares about days.  Birthdays, holidays, anniversaries etc.  They’ve just never mattered much to me because I’m sappy enough/corny enough/whatever enough to believe that EVERY day that I wake to is special.

Obviously, if you are one of those folks who stretches your birthday out for a week or more, I respect that and will celebrate with you.  I’m not a monster!  I just don’t expect or need anything for myself. Perhaps it’s because my own birthday falls so close to Christmas that I don’t expect much.  Christmas itself is about spending time with people I love and not about gifts. Fortunately, I’m surrounded by people who love me enough to not let me be without celebration.  So I happily eat cake and open presents and enjoy the moments.  I’m grateful for that.

My husband accepted this about me – and may have even been grateful that I didn’t demand or expect gifts to represent his love.  He made me laugh, he held me up and supported me and honored the ME that I am.  He openly loved me and showed me that.  You can’t put a bow on what we had.

When he put a ring on my finger, all that mattered to both of us was that we be surrounded by the people we loved, with the food and music that we loved.  So, on September 1, 2001, that’s exactly what happened.  We had the best party, with the best people, the best food, and promised to do our best for one another.  People still talk about the party and I believe that we kept that promise.

We chose this date because we knew that Labor Day weekend would make it easier for people to share our day.  We understood that there may be conflicts between the stage and our anniversary but it’s never been an issue.  We celebrated every day.  Every day. Sometimes, there was a nice dinner.

He wasn’t here last September 1^st.  That would have been our 20^th Wedding anniversary.  The kids and I ate Cuban food in his honor.  I managed to get through it with minimal Kleenex. 

I realized that I still wear the ring he put on my finger every day.  I often wear HIS ring around my neck.  These things make me feel connected to him but I do understand that I will eventually have to take them off and put them away in a jewelry box. I will have to learn to stop referring to “my husband” and add a “late” in there.  I don’t like that.

So I know that anniversaries don’t come with candle topped cakes, but maybe - just this once – I want one.  For this, our 21^st Wedding Anniversary, I’d give anything to be able to blow out those candles and make a wish.  I’d wish for just one more day with the love of my life, my cheerleader, my anchor, the father of my children. My other half.

Just One More Day.